I am a jack of all trades
Which is a blessing and a curse.
It means I can talk to just about anyone about one of my interests. It means I can have something in common with anyone.
The paint brush painted wide strokes and many colors which fascinate me and draw my eyes to different focal points.
The problem then comes in finding my other half. Someone who can match my aesthetic.
I need someone who likes most of what I like so My focus can drift and I don't get bored or feel like I'm settling.
I'm a fucking jig saw puzzle.
I love sports. My teams are Browns, Cavs, Indians, FCC and Cyclones. I like to go to at least two football games a year and one of everything else if I can. I play fantasy football.
I love music. Pretty much anything but country and heavy metal. Live shows are my favorite. I try to go to three shows a year. Festivals are better because people are free to be their weird self.
I love space. The night sky. Its vastness calms me. Dawn, sunrise and sunset. Clouds from above. Nature fascinates me. I love the dirt and getting my hands dirty. I badly want a garden and pots everywhere full of plants. Bodys of water and forests are always a source of energy as well. Thunderstorms are everything. The smell of just after a thunderstorm is one of my favorites. Walking through the woods, or down a beach. Swimming in a pond or ocean. Playing in a creek. All replenishes my soul.
I find joy in crystals and rocks and fossils for this reason.
I also love zoos, museums, and libraries. I want to absorb as much knowledge as possible. I love books. Books are my calm place. They comfort me. When I meditate it is actually by a fireplace surrounded by books that I can align myself and breathe.
I love helping. Volunteering to help the underdog in any way. Help any that are less fortunate. I volunteer, donate money regularly. I do walks and runs. Runs are also good for enjoyment and health.
I love culture. I want to experience as much of the world as possible. I love anime, comic con, renaissance festivals, food festivals, trying new food, and going new places.
I love art. I love things that people don't see as creative and appreciating it for the art that it is. Any craft is beautiful. I try my hand at so many and enjoy them. Photography, painting, drawing, oil pastel, interior design, fashion, knitting, scrapbooking, journaling, writing, dancing, building, Broadway, movies, tv shows. I want to try clay, and stained glass, and mosaics, and resin. I want to write a book. I write poetry and quips all the time.
I love the holidays. I want a wreath for every season and holiday. I want to decorate the fireplace mantel. I want family traditions. Activities, movies, bonding fun.
I feel like my past robbed me of so much, that I want to squeeze every good thing there is out of life while I can. I want to harvest that energy and make good of it. I want to never fear having nothing again because within myself I am capable of it all. I have survived and I will keep surviving. I will fight to help others survive. I will tell my story and see the silver lining in everything to have the power to get through it all.
Living is so damn beautiful. And the fear and pain have only let me see that the bottom isn't so bad. But when I get the good, it will be so beautiful.
How do I find this matching energy, and passion, and thirst for life?
While also just wanting to clean a home, garden, binge tv shows, and laugh with my family and kids. I want to know love.
I want to experience unconditional love.
So learning that the full saying is:
Jack of all trades, master of none. Though oftentimes better, than a master of none.
I am complex as they come, and yet. It is better that I am learning to love myself, than to win the love of many.
I love every fucking jig saw piece of myself. I love that I am a jack of all trades. I love me, and because of this, I am finding love I’ve always craved.
